Chapter 8

Hey guys....
I missed you guys so much...
I thought a lot before opening the blog again...
These are somethings you should know....

-No personal questions...
-Call me Shahad...
-You don't like the blog, don't read it...
-If i open my ask any rude questions will be deleted, i don't care...
-If you want to talk to me or tell me something use DM, I don't bite tara :P
-The girl in my picture isn't me..
-I will try to post as much as i can...
-If you need advice or help i'm here for you...


Anyways i continued typing for the people who love my blog and are excited about it <3
Ramadan Kareem, W tagabal allah 6a3atkom....
And enjoy the chapter!!<3



P.S: Your comments make my day....

Oh and this chapter is dedicated to the one and only @tweetiiya love you girl!!!!;***
YOLO




I got out of the car and began to make my way into Starbucks....
I was still very nervous...
I took a deep breath and then went in....
I then slowly let it out....

I looked around the place, trying to spot Mesharii.....
I then spotted Mesharii standing nervously clutching on a small box in the corner...
I smiled and walked towards him....




Mesharii's point of view....

She finally came...
She looked so darn pretty, her hair, her eyes, her smile....
I just adored her....
I don't know how i was going to tell her....

Maybe she doesn't feel the same way...
No, i am sure she does...
Look at how pretty her smile is....

I stared deeply into her eyes...

She looked so perfect, i wanted her and only her...

I gathered my courage and began to speak....



Mesharii: "Halla Shahad, shlonich..?!"
Shahad: "Il7amdellah, tamam, emmm w ent, shlonik..?!"
Mesharii: "Ana tamam....!!" I stared at her and smiled

I looked stupid, but i couldn't stop staring....
She looked shy, her cheeks were so red...

Shahad: "Mesharii emmmm yalla ebser3a mabii ata5ar 3al il jam3a...!!!"
Mesharii: "Inzain inzain... Emmm Shahad.... I..." I bent down on my knees and held her hand...


Her hands were so cold...
She was shaking, i could see that she was shocked of what i was doing...

I opened the box slowly revealing what was inside...






Shahad's point of view...


I was shocked of what Mesharii held up to me...
It was a RING...
It looked so expensive...
It was amazing....
It was covered with crystals...

I just stared into Mesharii's eyes...
He had a smile on his face which showed his dimples....
I was shocked...
I didn't say a word...
His smile started to fade away cause i kept quiet, I just stared at him...

My heart was beating fast...
I didn't know what to do...

Starbucks was empty since it was early in the morning...
The workers had sharp eyes on us, watching what my reaction was...
It was like they were watching a movie...


What do i say...
Shahad do you love him, is this the guy you want to wake up in the morning and find next to you...
Do you want to continue the rest of your life with a man like Mesharii...

Just look at him, he is so cute, his sparkling eyes, omg his so hot....

SHUT UP SHAHAD.... OFFFFF, NOT NOW....
YOU HAVE TO THINK....
Think Shahad, Think....
Yes or No...

SHAHAD YOU CAN'T JUST LEAVE THE GUY STANDING THERE WITH A BOX IN HIS HAND...
DO SOMETHING, SAY SOMETHING...



I opened my mouth to speak but now words came out...
I didn't know what to say...
I just stared at the ground shyly...
I didn't know what i wanted...

Mesharii then stood up....

Mesharii: "Shahad ana asif, i know it's too early bs you know everything about me, and in time you will know more.... Please Shahad say something...!"

There were a few seconds of silent...

Shahad: "I.... Emmmm... I'm sorry..... I can't....!"
Mesharii: "Shhhhhhhh Don't give me your answer now Shahad, take this ring and i will be waiting for a messaage from you tonight, just a Yes or No, nothing more... Shahad i truly love you with all my heart, i do, don't break my heart, just think about it, please... For me Shahad... I do love you Shahad and i will prove it will the days....!"
Shahad: "Mesharii I....!"

Mesharii put his fingers on my mouth...

Mesharii: "Shhhhhhhhh... Think Shahad, think....!!"


Mesharii looked sad...
I broke his heart...

I love him i do...
But i don't know...
I can't...



Mesharii then gave me a smile...
His smile was weak, it indicated that he was sad, it was a fake smile...
He than handed me the box and walked out of the place...

I couldn't believe what just happened...
I sat down to think a bit and gather myself together...


7aram Shahad, wallah he is really good..
La Shahad you can't marry him, you have to take care of your family, remember your father..
But i can visit them every once in a while...
No Shahad it won't be the same...
Bs 7aram i love Mesharii...
Shahad Your father, Your brother Fahad, Your sister Noora, who will take care of them...
Bs one day i will have to get married, and Mesharii is a great guy...
Shahad don't be selfish... Your family is importanter...

It was like there were two sides in my brain fighting against each other...
One side voted for me to say Yes...
And the other side voted for me to say No...
I didn't know to whom i should listen...

I then shut the voice in me and gathered myself and walked out of Starbucks...
I rode my car and drove to Kuwait University and attended all my classes...
But i didn't pay attention in class, i kept thinking of Mesharii...
I kept thinking of what Mesharii said, i didn't want to break his heart...
Everytime i asked myself if i loved him i would tell myself i don't know, but deep inside i knew, i knew that i loved him, i did, but i tried to deny it...






-





I looked at the time it was 8pm....
I sighed deeply....

I sat on my bed and thought about Mesahrii...
Mesharii told me that he was 24 years old so that makes him 5 years older than me...
He told me that he finished studying and was working now...
His major was engineering and he was a very hard working person...
Mesharii is a really sweet guy...

I was cut from my thoughts by the sound of my phone ringing....
I looked at the screen, it was Wedad...

I rushed to answer...

Shahad: "Aloo....!"
Wedad: "Aloo Shahad ishfeech?! Ilyoum entay mo 3ala ba3thich... Ishfeech 3asa ma shar?!"
Shahad: "Wedad sim3aay............................................" And i told her the story...
Wedad: "Awwwwwwww   *sniff* Eyaneeeeeen, can i spare him for a day...!!"
Shahad: "Wedad chub, Ana min 9ijii Wedad, Madre shagool... Sa3deni...!"
Wedad: "Shoofay Shahad lets be serious for a bit cause this isn't a game... Et7ebeena, Eee wela laa...!?"
Shahad: "Emmmm Eee bs...." She interrupted me...
Wedad: "La Shahad in love mako shay emsa bs.... You either love him or you don't, choose...!"

I closed my eyes and thought for a minute...
Deep inside i loved him, i loved him very much..
His smile, the scar over his eye, his dimples, his hair that had volume to it, his words...
I loved him, i did...
But............................


No there is no but in love Shahad, no but's in love....



Shahad: "Eee a7iba Wedad...!"
Wedad: "5ala9 3ayal what are you waiting for girl..?! Turn that frown upside down and go get him, you can do this, don't worry i am always here for you... And so is Nouf....!"
Shahad: "Thank you, Wallah A7bich, your amazing, 7ayatii wallah....!<3"
Wedad: "Don't thank me!!!!"
Shahad: "Eee w Wedad, Please digay 3ala Nouf w golelaha shino 9ar cause i'm not in the mood to talk now, cause if i don't tell her r7 tiz3al...!"
Wedad: "Inzain il7een adig 3alaha, bs yallah go talk to him ya 7aywana...!!"
Shahad: "Okay okay yallah Chaw...!!"
Wedad: "Chaw...!"


I closed the phone and sat on my bed clutching on my iphone...
I stared at the screen sharply...






Mesharii's point of view....


Ya rab etgool ee, wallah ana a7ibha...
Ana abeeha bil 7alal, ana shareeha wallah...


I held my phone and decided to put a song....
I choose ( عصام كمال - غايب )

طول ما انت غايب مالي اي حبايب
محد يواسيني غير ضي القمر
لانوم اللي يجيني وينك نظر عيني
غيابك مأذيني مليت حتى السهر
وينك ارجع لي وينك يالغالي ؟
حتى عدوي صار يبكي على حالي
محتاج انا اشمك وتضمك احضاني
كل خوفي ماتلحق وبموتي تلقاني
لاتطول الغيبة غيابك مصيبة
اسود لبس قلبي وعليك والله انفطر
ياعمري طاوعني ارجع لي
صدقني بغيابك كرهت كلمة سفر
مو لحظة وداعك ظلت انا ببالي؟
من قلتي لك الله وياك الموت جا قبالي
يامتى تجي انت يامتى تدق بابي
صارت دموع العين بغيابك اصحابي

The song affected me...
The words exactly expressed how i felt towards Shahad...
Every word was right, every melody was true...
It all reminded me of her, her smile, her dimple, her long cinnamon hair....

She still didn't answer...
Please let her say yes, pleeeaaassseee....





Shahad's point of view...


I unlocked my iphone and went to the messages....
I wrote Mesharii's number since i knew it by heart...
I then moved my fingers down the screen...

Shahad your dad, who is going to take care of Fahad and Noora...
Obooj mafeeh 7al, ta3ban, kibeer bil 3omor..
You can't leave him....

I moved my finger across to the (N) and pressed it, then shifted my finger to the (O) and pressed it...

I then moved my finger to the send button...

Do i press it??!
Do i send it...?!
La Shahad....
I love him Shahad...
Shahad you have to, it's for the best, for your dad, for Fahad, for Noora...
I don't wanna break his heart...
Shahad think of your dad....


I moved my finger away from the send button, then back... I did that over 5 times...

DO I SEND IT?!!!!
NO SHAHAD DON'T...
YES SHAHAD SEND IT...


My brain was fighting with itself.....

I shut the voice that was in me and made up my mind....

I....................................................................